CRES founded 1982 _ On the web since.1997. 

Key words: Kansas City weddings package officiant minister interfaith Civil Secular Budget mixed marriage same-sex gay LGBTQ Vern Barnet CRES, Johnson County
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We draw upon the worlds secular and religious traditions,
respecting the perspectives of both doubter and believer.

Planning Points

      These Planning Points may be useful.
     Make as many responses as you are able
     at this time, at least 1-4, 6, 9, 10

     Send them to me at vern@cres.org
     We will plan the wedding you desire.
     Thank you.      
                             LEARN MORE.

Vern Barnet   

         
 
Regular times for ZOOM PLANNINGlink to FULL INDEX
   

1a. Wedding date and ceremony start time.
       This is often 30 minutes or more after the rental time begins.
      example: September 5, 2026 Saturday 2 pm
1b. Rehearsal date and time as arranged with the Chapel 

2a. First Person's legal name
2b. Name in ceremony (James or Jim) 
LEARN MORE
2c. Age today
2d. Address
2e. Phone(s)
2f. Email address

3a. Second Person's legal name
3b. Name in ceremony (Joan or Jo) 
LEARN MORE
3c. Age today
3d. Address
3e. Phone(s)
3f. Email address


4. Will you have a marriage license or is this wedding a ceremonial occasion without legal considerations?
     a. legal with marriage license    LEARN MORE  
     b. ceremonial only      LEARN MORE
     c. any details you wish to share
 
    FOR PILGRIM CHAPEL, A LICENSE IS REQUIRED
    FROM ANY MISSOURI COUNTY.
 
   
MANY COUPLES IN KANSAS CITY USE JACKSON COUNTY.
    PLATTE AND CLAY COUNTIES PROVIDE GOOD CERTIFICATES,    
    LAFAYETTE
PROVIDES NONE. 
IF YOU USE BUCHANAN COUNTY,
    YOU MUST RETURN THE LICENSE AFTER THE WEDDING.
    

 5. If you will have a marriage license,
    please include the names of your
    two adult witnesses

    to sign the documents (license, certificate) here:

6. As far as RELIGION goes, the ceremony should be
   
a. civil (no religious references)
    b. spiritual without reference to a particular faith
    c. Christian
    d. multi-faith
    e. other _____________________

7. About marriage VOWS -- 
    
a. We wish TRADITIONAL VOWS.
     b. We will write our own,
         perhaps adapting THESE SUGGESTIONS.

#aboutReadings
8a. About readings --
     a. We want no readings.
     b. From the list here 
        we want the following, numbered . . . .
     c. We have chosen other reading(s), 
        namely:
8b. Reader(s) --
     x. We want the minister to do the reading.
     y. The person(s) to offer the reading(s):

9. How many people (total everyone) might attend?

10. If you are presently out of town, when will you both will arrive in Kansas City?

-=:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::=-

11. List Wedding other participants   (and team)
         In addition to the couple and minister,
          others may be involved in ceremony.
          Same-sex couples can adapt as they wish.
          Besides the
* two witnesses, wedding roles may be --
          Examples for large wedding--  
     * Bride's Escort: Amati Scorta, Jane's father
     * Bride's presenter: Bride's Mom and Dad
     * Groom's presenter: Groom's Mom and Uncle Tio

     Matron or Maid of Honor: Mejor Amiga, bride's aunt
     Best Man: Meilleur Ami, groom's best friend
     Bridesmaids: Lucky Walker, Lulu Stertch
     Groomsmen: Guy Walker, Kid Stretch
     Flower Girl or Boy: Violet Fluriste, Lucky's daughter (5 yrs old)
     Ring-bearer: Porteur Danneu, Lucky's son (6 yrs old)
     Ushers: Groom's brother, Bride's aunt
     
Readers: Son Oncle, Bride's uncle
    
Guest Book attendant: Paige Binding, neighbor
 
   Flower duty: If the bride carries flowers and has no attendant
                           standing with her, who will hold the flowers
                           from after the formal  welcome until
                           just before the concluding benediction?
     Musician: Peg Strings, guitar 
     Sound Engineer: Vol Dial, friend 
     Photography: Pic Graphie, Super Photo Studio
     Videographer: Lens Corder, Sharp Memories, Inc
     #WedPlanner
     Planner:
Wedding planners or coordinators are not
    usually necessary. If you choose to hire one,
    please provide the name and contact information.

12.  After you are dressed and ready for the ceremony,
      a. We are happy to see each other.
      b. We want to wait until the ceremony begins before seeing each other.

13. Will you exchange rings? 
     2 rings /  1 ring  / no rings

14. Do you want to include your children in a vow ceremony?   LEARN MORE
     Yes /  No  /  Maybe / Does not apply

15. Your entrance / processional plans:
     Different styles explained here
             1 or 1+ Traditional Plan
             2 or 2+  ChapeL Plan
             3 or 3+  Paired Plan
             4 or 4=  Couple Plan
             5 . . . .   CustoM Plan:

16. Please include a remembrance of those not with us by name: 

17. Any announcements you want made by the minister, such as
     a. silence cell phones
     b. take no photos during the ceremony
     c. please take photos of the ceremony
        and send them to the couple
     d. reminder of reception time/place
     e. throw flower petals as the couple exits
     f. ____________________

18. Your plans for MUSIC:  live  /  recorded  /  none
     
Additional information:
           ADVICE about RECORDED MUSIC, CLICK HERE
           ADVICE FOR MUSICIANS, CLICK HERE

19. Your plans for photography: 
       B. Before the ceremony
       D. During the ceremony
       A. After the ceremony
       G. Ask Guests to take pics and share later

          ADVICE FOR PHOTOGRAPHERS, CLICK HERE

#sequence
20.
Here is a basic wedding sequence, followed by additional OPTIONAL RITES. How might you wish
to alter or add to this sequence?

    Witnesses sign license, certificate LEARN MORE
    Minister greets guests informally LEARN MORE
    Lighting of candles
    Prelude and
    Seating of parents and special guests
#main_sequence

    Processional
    Welcome by the minister
    Consent and Presentations
    Prayer [if desired]
    
Reading(s) [if desired]
    Exchanging of Vows and rings 
     [Any special rite]
    Pronouncement and embrace
    Benediction [or Farewell Wish]
    Recessional 

21. If you have a wedding announcement or registry site (theknot.com, zola.com, appycouple.com, withjoy.com, etc), noting it here will help me get acquainted and prepare for your wedding.
     If you have an electronic invitation, or can take a picture of your printed invitation, and can send that to me, I'll have a better idea of the kind of wedding you envision.

22.
The "paperwork" usually includes both a License and a Certificate. The Marriage Certificate is yours to keep. (A Certified Copy of the License can be
sent to you if you requested it when applying for your License, or you can request it later.)
 
     a. We will return the License to the Court.
     b. We'd prefer you to return the License.

#SpecialRites
------------------------------------------
EXAMPLES OF SPECIAL RITES
The couple provides the equipment and materials
------------------------------------------
  • unity candle ceremony
  • sand ceremony
  • wine-box ceremony
  • wine or cardamom seed rite
  • giving flowers to parents
  • symbolic gifts
  • for weddings with full rentals: rites from specific faiths such as Christian Eucharist, Hindu aarti, Buddhist bells, Muslim Bismillah in Arabic, Jewish breaking of a goblet and Priestly Benediction in Hebrew, American Indian smudging, hand-fasting, and so forth
#informal
ABOUT THE INFORMAL GREETING
     By welcoming your guests to what may be for them an unfamiliar place, with appropriate reminders (such as the custom of standing when the bride appears) and previewing the ceremony, a more comfortable and enjoyable wedding for everyone can then begin.

#nickname
NAME USED IN CEREMONY 
     Let me know if you prefer to be called by your familiar name ("nickname") during the wedding
(Jim instead of James, Babs instead of Barbara).

#signing
WITNESSES SIGN MARRIAGE DOCUMENTS
     
Before the wedding, after I prepare the license and certificate, I invite the witnesses to sign. Most brides and grooms want to be with their guests or have photos taken and not fuss with paperwork after the ceremony, and chasing down the witnesses can be awkward. Taking care of the legal requirements before the ceremony works well for everyone.

#more_ideas
MORE IDEAS

     Your wedding should be what you want it to be.  When we visit to plan the ceremony, as I get to know you, I may have suggestions for achieving your desires. If you wish to examine ideas available on the web for additional ideas before we meet, here is one website that may be helpful.

#blended
BLENDED FAMILY
Option 1:
     Parenthood brings with it a lifetime of unique responsibilities and immeasurable rewards.
     (a) As a married couple, __ and __, do you celebrate and welcome these children, __ and __, into your marriage and enlarged family, expanding  your love and commitment as parents to embrace them fully as your children together?
     (b) Will you love them unconditionally, respect their individuality, model for them the values of kindness, honesty, and compassion, sharing in the joy of their accomplishments and their milestones, and cheering them through every chapter of their lives with steadfast support?  WE WILL.
     Children, You have just heard this promise of love from your married parents. Do you accept and return this love as you become a family in a new way through this marriage?  WE DO. [Depending on ages, more may be said.]

Option 2:
The parents and adults can mix colored sand or glass beads together to celebrate the beauty of individuality within the mixture of a family bonded together.

Option 3:
Parents can present each child with a gift, or simply by hugging each.

Option 4:
The vows said by the couple can be expanded to include the children.

Option 5:
Children can be recognized by their silent participation in the ceremony by taking roles such as made of honor, bed man, reader, and such.

Other Options:
Various websites such as thes offer additional ideas:

https://www.owlandroseceremonies.com/blog/vows-to-step-kids-blended-family-vows






https://www.owlandroseceremonies.com/blog/vows-to-step-kids-blended-family-vows